Conversation

Who is in the bathroom?

It is a weekday morning. Downstair Mrs. Faujiah is asking Mr. Fauji what he wants for breakfast.

Mrs. Faujiah : Fauji. Do you want an egg for breakfast?

Mr. Fauji : I want the newspaper and a cup of coffea .

Mrs. Faujiah : Or cornflakes?

Mr. Fauji : Where is it?

Mrs. Faujiah : Or toast?

Mr. Fauji : Faujiah, where’s the newspaper?

Mrs. Faujiah : I don’t know.

Mr. Fauji : Oh.

Mrs. Faujiah : Fauji ! Do you want an egg, cornflakes or toast?

Mr. Fauji : (He looks vague.) Yes. That’s a very good idea.

(Upstairs Imam is waiting outside the bathroom. The door is shut and he can’t get in. Then Ulfah comes along.)

Ulfah : Oh! Hello.

Imam : Hello, Ulfah. Do you want a bath?

Ulfah : Yes. Who is in the bathroom?

Imam : I don’t know.

Ulfah : Is it Ted?

Imam : I don’t think so. He’s running at this time, usually.

Ulfah : Oh yes.

Imam : if it isn’t Ted, it’s Anna.

Ulfah : Why don’t you knock on the door and ask?

Imam : Me?

Ulfah : Yes. It’s late.

Imam : Oh, all right. ( He knocks on the door.) Ann?

Anna : (She speaks from behind them.) : Hello?

Imam : It’s  late.

Anna : Yes, it is.

(Imam and Ulfah turn round and see Anna in her uniform.)

Ulfah : Oh! You’re there. You’re not in the bathromm.

Anna : No. what’s the matter?

Ulfah : Someone’s in the bathroom.

Imam : Ted !

Ulfah : I suppose so.

Anna : Doesn’t Ted go out running?

Imam : Yes, he does. But he can’t be running this morning. (He knocks on the door.) Ted!

Anna : Do you think he’s all right?

Imam : I hope so.

Anna : Let me knock. (She knocks on the door.) There’s something the matter !

Ulfah : Yes, there is.

Imam : Stand back…

Anna : Be careful !

Imam : It’s all right. I’m good at opening doors. One…two…three…now! (He runs at the door.) Ouch !

Ulfah : (Laughing.) Oh, Mark!

Anna : Are you hurt? Let me see ! Don’t move Imam. Careful.

(Mr. fauji comes along)

Mr. Fauji : What’s the matter?

Ulfah : Mark is hurt.

Imam : It doesn’t matter. I’m all right.

Anna : Ted’s in the bathroom.

Ulfah : yes, maybe he is in the bathroom But he doesn’t answer.

Anna : We can’t hear him at all.

Mr. Fauji : That’s strange and terrible. (He looks through the keyhole.) Ted! Can you hear me?

Anna : Can you hear anything?

Mr. Fauji : I can hear you talking.

Anna : Oh, sorry.

(Ted comes into the house. He comes up the stairs and stands behind them. Ulfah sees him first.)

Ulfah : Ted!

Imam : Sh! Don’t talk.

Ulfah : But he’s here.

Ted : What’s the matter?  (The others look round.)

Mr. Fauji : Ted!

Imam : You are not in the bathroom .

Ted : Of course I’m not in the bathroom. I’m here.

Ulfah : what?. Now you are here But I don’t understand. If Ted is here. Who is in the bathroom now ?